Sports Anxiety: Becoming a Winner with EFT Therapy By Neasa De Baróid, B.A.Psych/Soc

Golf Art. Juan Les Pins, France   

                                      

SKYPE EFT THERAPY FOR SPORT with EFT CORK

Biography: Hailing from Cork City on the south coast of Ireland, Neasa completed her psychology/sociology degree at UCC in 1988, and dived full-time into the world of professional international singing.  Debilitating performance anxiety eventually took it’s toll physically, forcing Neasa to look deeper into the causes that required healing.  She rediscovered her natural affinity with all things psychological and, mixed with her passion for energy healing, she trained as an EFT therapist – Emotional Freedom Techniques.  Her keen insight into the psychology of performance issues has led to many performance schools referring their students to her.  Neasa still sings professionally.  “We are all performers.  Whether as parents, employees or on stage, we hunger to be our best” – Neasa  http://www.efteurope.com   www.eftcork.com   www.neasa.com

A professional tennis player contacted me about what had become a pattern of consistently losing tennis games.  As ‘Chris’ was preparing for a major WTA tennis championship, his panic was running high.  The following occurred in five sessions via Skype.

No stranger myself to
Stage Fright in my capacity as a professional singer, we quickly got straight to the main cause — his dad. A controlling man, acting as manager, the father tried to improve his son’s performance by shouting at him, regularly pointing out his weak points in an undermining fashion.  When Chris imagined his dad, his anxiety was at a 10, so we weren’t going anywhere until we put him emotionally back in command with his father.  Using mental imagery of the dad at his worst, roaring, we made a list of Chris’s fears:
  • That his dad might lose control and hit him
  • That he was a huge disappointment to his father
  • That dad held all the money, hence all the career decisions; Chris was utterly dependent
  • That each time he failed, instead of bringing home badly needed prize money, it was costing the family more and more
Entering Senior age bracket, the pressure had mounted because of an initial win, which he put down to beginner’s luck.  Becoming flavor of the month had actually intensified the pressure.  After that, he lost four games in a row.  Subsequently, losing became the norm.

We used the EFT Movie Technique on his four losing games, during which I queried why he’d put his initial win down to beginner’s luck.  Because he was now playing against people he had admired, four names in particular, he felt small and inferior and had pre-determined he didn’t have a chance against these seasoned players.  We tapped on: “Even though he’s older than me and has good ranking, we are all Top WTAs, all with equal skill. The only difference between us is the size of our thoughts”.  We tapped on Chris seeing himself as huge, vast, powerful.  Eventually, he was able to close his eyes and say each of the four players’ names with 0 intensity.  He reported they now didn’t look “big,” and that he was actually recognizing his own special skills.

I asked him to see himself winning against them.  This was still difficult because, he explained, he lacked speed in reaching the ball and noted a previously unidentified thought that “There’s no point, I won’t make the ball”.  While tapping on this limiting belief, I asked Chris to imagine being in the game, feeling his body, and to gauge what it was about his body sensations that made him conclude this.  Chris responded, “The assumption I won’t reach the ball reduces my energy to run, and makes my legs feel heavy”, so we tapped on this, and then replaced it with more positive suggestions such as “I can always reach that ball, swift, easy, lightly”.

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There was, however, some remaining belief about an inability to reach the ball and still some of the heavy feeling in his legs. I got a sense of an unsafety issue, a need for protection.  Tapping, I asked why he would need to keep his legs or arms so inflexible and prevent himself reaching too freely for that ball; for what reasons was he protecting himself by keeping his reach small.  He answered, “In case I damage my leg further”. It emerged that he had broken a leg in his younger years. He realized two limiting beliefs in this:

First, he was harbouring a previously unidentified, subconscious assumption that the leg was weak and that it would always impede his speed in reaching the ball.                Second, he feared in stretching too far the leg might snap again, leaving him permanently damaged as a tennis player.  He was thus subconsciously protecting this leg.  The belief and the fear it caused had resulted in shortening his reach for the ball.  We tapped all aspects of the injury as well as the belief and fear that resulted and kept tapping until the intensity dropped to 0.

We then tapped in an image of his dad accepting him, win or not win.  In between our sessions, Chris tested the results with his father.  At our next session, he reported how his view of his dad had changed.  Initially, his dad had seemed to hold huge power over Chris.  Now Chris saw his father as injured through his own childhood and acting out from that childhood injury. Chris now saw a frightened child instead of an overpowering dad. There was some remaining anxiety, however, which we brought to 0. Interestingly, his father was now being kinder and more respectful toward Chris, and had apologized for treating him badly.

Our only responsibility is to change ourselves. Time and time again, however, we find that when we let go of feeding an unhealthy relationship, there is nothing for the other to feed on energetically, and the other’s behaviour toward us changes as a result. Also, others can sense that we are firmer, taking less nonsense. They begin to treat us as we treat ourselves—respectfully!

 

Open to your Greatest Potential, your full colour

 

In Chris’s next session, he was much more vivacious, having played a match and won. Now the real fun began. Though it is crucial to break down old emotional traumas and the limiting beliefs that result, I find the building-back-up part exciting — planting new seeds, new self-images, and watching the client’s body language and facial expression release before my eyes.

I put together a visual program for Chris, based on NLP. While tapping, I guided him through a new vision of his game and of himself, which he saw in his mind’s eye:

  • His opponents were getting smaller, then tiny.  Meanwhile, he saw himself expanded with the newfound confidence we were planting, yet light, fast and agile.
  • His tenns racket was the ideal weight, fitting his hand comfortably, and seemed to do all the work for him.
  • The ball seemed to be coming in slow motion, allowing him to see well in advance where to aim, and getting there way ahead of time.
  • I had him hear his name being called as the winner; hear the crowd roaring.  Feel the love coming from them.  Feel the support of fellow players
  • See his father’s joy – for Chris.  Feel the trophy in his hands.
  • Changing his false impression of senior players as superior to him, which had created cowering and muscle tension.
  • Feeling his legs as nimble and filled with energy.

Brighter Performance with EFT

You can’t be in “the Flow” with tension. You can’t be in “the Flow” when your energy is focused outward, anxious about your audience, your family, your teachers, your coach, your opponents.  Consider it like carrying a heavy sack of bricks while trying to perform.
I got my final Skype call from a happy tennis star.  The images we had planted all came to life — even the ball moved slower! And he had just “knocked the socks off” his opponents in six consecutive games. 😊

Blending EFT with a deep instinct for what creates human struggle, I use these same techniques effectively for a variety of physical and emotional issues.  If you feel you could be living greater, with more purpose and passion, I will be so happy to guide you in moving towards your #GreatestPotential.

Health Zone Presentation on EFT – Thurs. 17th Nov 2016

TappingHealth Zone Presentation
This Thursday, 17th November 2016
7.30pm sharp

Next Thursday night at The Health ZoneI will speak about the benefits of combining modern psychology with ancient Eastern acupressure to pull the clouds back off the subconscious.

My psychology training always left me feeling like something was missing in guiding people to heal. Traditional psychology treats a specific event as the cause of our problem or unwanted behaviour.

EFT however sees an additional step between cause and response. It looks to how we download emotions into our energy body in response to this specific event. EFT treats the downloaded emotion stuck in the body, rather than just the story of an event. In EFT, we stimulate the energy body through tapping acupressure points in order to clear the emotions that are trapped in our cells.

The big bonus is that I will teach you the simple yet powerful technique of EFT to take home and use on yourself, family and friends.

AND in addition to all this, Astrologer Martha Clarke will talk about how the Astrological House effects your energy levels. Now we could all do with a bit of that with the Super Moon presently hanging ’round with all it’s spiritual meaning. 

Limited places NOW available for this exciting and special event.

You can book your place here: https://goo.gl/i01PxN

Looking forward to seeing you!

Neasa

Neasa De Baroid is a singer, performer and an EFT Practitioner in Cork City

The Carrot and The Donkey!

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donkey-carrot-and-stickWe are all given a catalyst in life.

Rather like a compass, it shows us where we are and to where we are trying to navigate. This catalyst, which I refer to as our Carrot, usually comes in the form of our greatest life challenge. It is referred to by some as ‘Our Cross’ which we must bear.

However, if we can change our perspective; see it as Our Great Opportunity – a signpost directing us out of the darkness and in the direction of our Greatest Freedom, a return to our true Self, it offers us the chance to peel off the mask that fits too tightly, too restrictively. This release allows us breathe into the full expanse of our Greatest Potential.

It is a setting-free from a lifetime of self-imposed imprisonment of who we think we should be to be accepted, liked, loved; the safety net from potential rejection, isolation and abandonment. But ultimately it is a restrictive mask slowly smothering us to death.

I first heard the story of The Carrot & the Donkey as a schoolchild. It depicts a long stick extending from the rider dangling a carrot from a string. This potential reward propels the donkey forward on its journey. Somewhat like chasing a rainbow, the elusive pot of gold is always out of reach.

The good news, however, for those of us seeking freedom from our past is that freedom eludes us less and less as we move towards it.

My Carrot, or catalyst, was my voice and a passion for singing versus my battle with terror that virtually paralysed me into submission more than once. That quiet flame burning within me always enticed me back, so resuming my journey in hope of one day ‘enjoying the juices of my carrot’.

Terror made struggle in all facets of life. It kept me small in career and finance.  Socially, there were situations and people to be avoided.

Why? Because of an underlying anxiety – a limiting belief that I was not good enough; a joke. And I expected others to take me seriously?!

Forcing through the fear led to illness. When we ignore emotions we have buried in our bodies, the body grabs our attention to the need for change in ways we can no longer ignore. The body represents suppressed emotion as a physical manifestation. If not for chasing my carrot, freeing my voice to its true power, I’d never have invested the energy into finding my way home to me; accepting ‘Me’ as good enough.

When I did, the floodgates opened.

Miracles began to cascade on my life. Support systems ‘fell’ into place without effort; chance meetings with people eager to help. A new world opened up in complete contrast to anything I’d known. The old world, based on my old beliefs had created a life of pushing against a raging tide. ‘Life is a battleground’ was a belief that bore its respective fruits just as obediently as my new belief, ‘I am Enough’, was now bearing an altogether juicier fruit, over-writing the bitter taste of the past.

We are powerful creators in a bountiful garden. What we grow depends on the seeds of thought we set. What Crop (or crap) do you wish to harvest?

I have travelled through many countries which were part of the running-away from Me. Following the carrot however commenced a journey to deep-within places I never imagined lurked inside of me; fascinating lands. Sometimes travelling through the dark of fear, often with no spotlight, I wanted to turn back to the days of unawareness, blissful debilitating ignorance.  Looking back now I see it as the most inspiring journey of my life.

‘Til we have sat in the dark we can never know the brilliance of light.

My carrot, which at times felt unattainable, leads me every day closer to Home, closer to Me. Changing my perspective allows me to live as Victor not Victim, seeing the pain as an ‘Opportunity’, not a ‘Cross’.

It’s been a journey into wisdom that’s led me through the dark, to face down crippling limiting beliefs and emotions buried from decades past, opening my path to healing.

Forever grateful for I am the Donkey with my Carrot.

Neasa x

Neasa De Baroid is a singer, performer and an EFT Practitioner in Cork City